Pride and confidence at first glance may seem like there is only a fine line that separates the two, but as we look into the differences between pride and confidence, you may begin to see how different yet similar they are.
What is Pride?
There are two main kinds of pride, and we’ll dive into the two types below.
One definition of pride is authentic pride, which is about feeling joy or good about your performance or that of others for a job well done or something accomplished in life. While accomplishments can often make us think of trophies or career milestones, achievements can also be about working hard or overcoming challenging times. You can also feel pride about characteristics you value in yourself or others, such as your loyalty to family and friends.
Pride tends to be about what has already happened, what you have in hand—feeling good about something from within. Authentic pride is supportive, whether the pride is for others or about being proud of yourself. Authentic pride is healthy and comes from a heartfelt place.
There is also hubristic pride, which feels more arrogant and egotistical. Someone may come across as being better than others, deserving of, or more important. This type of pride is ego-based and comes from a deeper sense of insecurity or underlying low self-esteem.
Typically when we see pride in terms of boasting or arrogance, that person is not in acceptance of themselves and is feeling from their heart. In feeling a disconnection from one’s heart, it is expected they look to external sources to feel better about themselves. They may also attempt to act better than others or seek the attention of others in various ways, such as through material things or showing off to gain praise.
What’s most important to note is that even though arrogant, prideful people may come across as having extremely high self-esteem and have power or social status, they are more distant from love, their true self, and others. They may carry more shame and have some underlying hurt or insecurity they are trying to overshadow with their big egos.
What is Confidence?
Having confidence is about believing in yourself and your abilities. Confidence is a good thing. Healthy confidence is a great thing to have and often correlates with finding fulfillment, joy, and happiness in life. True confidence comes from having healthy self-esteem and self-love.
You can feel more confident in some areas of life than others. For example, maybe you are super confident in how you run to interact with clients but have less confidence in managing your money. While some people are naturally confident overall or in certain areas of their lives, confidence is something anyone can quire with effort and practice.
Confidence supports people in living with integrity, finding love in their lives, knowing who they are without the approval of others. Confidence allows people to go after their dreams and goals in life, take responsible risks, and experience life. They believe in themselves and their abilities to do good in the world and help others.
Differences Between Pride and Confidence
The main difference between arrogant pride and confidence really comes down to the inner workings of the person. Confidence comes from a place of self-love, self-acceptance, self-assurance, believing in yourself, and confidence comes from knowing that you matter in the world.
Supportive pride and healthy pride come from a similar place within as confidence does. Healthy pride for yourself and others comes from that feeling of accomplishment, working hard, and achieving results. It’s about something that has happened to you or someone else, and it comes from a heartfelt place of support.
Boastful or arrogant pride comes from a place of separation from self or disconnection from one’s heart. Boastful pride is an attempt to feel a void within by seeking external validation or excessive boasting so that others do not see your imperfections, flaws, pain, vulnerability, etc. It’s a way of being bigger to conceal a lack of something.
Confident people find their confidence from within. They’ve developed inner peace and acceptance of who they are. They aren’t looking to prove themselves to anyone.
Having a healthy pride for others or oneself comes from that same inner place of acceptance and love.
Hubristic individuals allow their pride to get in the way, and they come across as arrogant or having a big ego. They are looking to be superior to feel better about themselves because they have a lack of self-confidence from within.
In discerning the difference between confidence and boastful pride is to challenge yourself to see people from your own heart rather than a place of judgment- as confident people do not need to judge or put anyone down to feel good about themselves.
More About Confidence:
Karla Kueber is a Certified Evidence Based EFT Practioner and Health Coach with a background in Energy Medicine and a double Masters Degree in Education. She works with people to, heal trauma, overcome their past and use it to fuel their future. You can learn more about her own healing journey here.